Why did I study Creative Writing?

Have you ever been lost in your life? Well, I bet most of us had had this feeling of What am I going to do the rest of my life? Or Am I going to be good enough? Those were questions regarding my life and my major, I had not only the pressure of my family, yes it was a must-have degree, but it was also the social pressure itself, or at least my social environment. Before embracing you on studying Creative Writing or Literature, let me tell you a little bit about me and my failures in other majors. (Yes that rhymes and is called cacophony, which is a mistake in literature, but I am leaving it since it sounds funny)

I graduated from High School back in 2008 and I immediately enrolled in Law School thinking that it was ok for me, I was no excited about Law it just happened and let me tell you how. I happened to apply to the best University in Law and I passed, therefore, my family was proud and I remember them saying ¨We have a Doctor in the family (my sister) and now we will have a lawyer¨ I was somehow dragged by the feeling of having an important major and build a career, but as you can tell by now it didn´t work out. The stress, insomnia, the depression wasn´t worth it for something that I never picture myself in. Then I dropped, of course, and I took a year of self-reflection and well my family started struggling with money. In 2012 I say to myself ¨Massive Communication and Journalism is what I want¨ another mistake. It seemed now that my life was repeating itself, like a history book.  I enrolled in a prestigious University and I started with my family support. Here is when I want to believe in destiny, my family went into bankruptcy, and well they couldn´t pay any more for my tuition and it was ok with me because I did not want to tell them yet that, me again, choose the wrong major. With things going this bad, I flew to the United States to change my environment, and more and little did I know it was me escaping my reality. When it was time to come back to Colombia I was anxious, depressed, and lost (that is another thing) as soon as I arrived I planned my life around leaving my country. I started working in Bilingual Call Centers which they were ok (they pay a lot in Colombia), and not really thinking about a real future, but in the road I figured that for me to immigrate to another country I needed, first: Money and second: A Bachelor Degree. Yes, finally we will talk about studying Literature or Creative Writing. 

I learned that you don´t need a reason for everything, or at least a good reason. I just thought ¨I am kinda good at writing and I want to graduate as soon as possible¨ Those were my reasons, and dear reader I am telling you, there are no better or worse reasons, there are  just consequences. In my case the consequences were great, at the beginning I had my issues with doubting myself on ¨if I was good enough to be a writer¨. The idea of a writer, for me was not related with arts, therefore my first experience was a bit shocking, meaning all my school mates knew a lot about literature, classics, styles and more, and me, well I only knew about nothing. 

Hence my first advice is, if you want to learned about Literature and how to write, you must be prepared to open your mind to a whole new level of knowledge, because is not only about writers and knowing grammar, is about knowing about cultures, different people, focus in your own environment and thinking outside the box. Of course, if you want to be a good writer. 

Second, don´t feel discourage of choosing a Bachelor on arts. One of the thing I always hated while I studied Creative Writing was the question What is that for? I completely understood old people asking that but nowadays there is a whole new level of new majors and career paths. Yes, I won´t say is easier a job in writing that in business, I will be lying, but is worth it in term of knowledge, on changing your point of view regarding everything and understanding where others are coming from, for me is about understanding the history, the world and perpespectives through books and words. 

Third, just do it. Remember every choice had their consequences, I am telling you my story, but yours could be even better or way worse. We all are different and I can just encourage you since I stand my decision until this day. 

Long Gone

When I started this blog, in 2019 I didn’t know where I was heading, I didn’t have goals or a future plan. Time was just passing by, surviving the day and hoping…hoping that magically everything was going to get better and that I will become something. 

This is how my life was, until a month ago or so, I started realizing that what I was afraid of was happening. I realized that I have become an adult a long time ago but I was behaving like a teenager, where I was wasting my time, and the excuse of my mental health worked for a while, maybe too much time, but I started wondering, Am I going to spend my life just waiting to die? Am I going to only wait, without actually doing something for me? 

Back on track

Yet, I can’t say I am all into the future, or that I have a super clear plan, because if 2020 teach of to of all us, is that plans, goals and dreams change and even so, we still have hopes and plans, well is the first time and years where I started to have goals, and I start thinking of a future where living with depression and anxiety could be possible…

Maybe I am just cutting the bushes here for what I have to say and basically I am just saying that I am starting with my blog. Everything will change from now on. I am back on track with this project, I am back on track with what I want to say… is not anymore about pretending to be a good reviewer or the best writer, actually this blog is going to be about me, experiences, life, and of course writing, after all I am one.